Despite the numerous IT systems, apps and programs in place these days which promise to make our lives easier, employees are struggling more than ever with stressful situations and increasing demands on their time and resources.
As a result of this, an increased number of organisations are reaching out to me to assist with their staff wellbeing needs, whether it is running a resilience workshop, speaking at their annual conference on the topic of resilience, or even doing some one on one wellbeing coaching with their staff.
Your ability to be a resilient person, has a great deal to do with your beliefs, thought patterns and whether you believe deep down that you will be able to cope when unexpected circumstances or change arise. Those people who struggle with resilience often have a deep fear that something bad will happen and in turn, that they will not be able to handle it effectively. Therefore, when faced with a change in circumstances or expectation, they find that their mind is flooded with negative thoughts, often bringing up old wounds and an expectation that the worst will happen! They will also feel dis-empowered.
A resilient person however, is able to soothe and encourage their negative thoughts. They may still feel fearful, but there is an expectation that things will be ok and they will be able to cope. They also feel more empowered and have a greater ability to bounce back.
As I often explain during my workshops, it is often not the change in circumstances which causes our stress – it is what ‘ we make it mean’
Think about it – if you make a mistake at work, what do you make it mean about yourself?’
If you are resilient, then the chances are you will just soothe yourself and remind yourself that you are human and it is normal to make mistakes. You may also learn from the mistake you have made and improve on the task it moving forward. I liken this to your emotions feeling safe and steady.
However, if you are struggle with resilience, making a mistake is likely to knock your emotions off balance – a bit like that emotional roller coaster we all often find ourselves on occasionally! You may also make this mean that you are a failure, no good at your job or not good enough. You may also continue to beat yourself up about the mistake for days or even weeks!
Resilience is actually a very personal thing and everyone is different. However, if you really wish to make a difference in your life or your employee’s life, the key is to work on the inner emotions and share with employees techniques to re-frame and soothe themselves in times of stress or change. The change has to come from within and a master at resilience can remain calm and in control, despite the circumstances around them. This often steps from positive self-belief, confidence and the ability to control outcomes.
Lisa Phillips is a motivational speaker and coach whose expertise lies in the areas of self-esteem, confidence and resilience. Her work on resilience has been featured in a wide range of magazines and she has spoken at many conferences and facilitated workshops on resilience within Industries such as Aged and Health Care, Education, Financial Services, Banking, Hospitality and also within the public sector.
To find out more, please see www.amazingcoaching.co.uk or www.howtoempoweryourstaff.co.uk
Lisa also has a range of online training modules which include the topics of resilience and stress management. Please see here for a full list of Lisa’s online courses. http://the-confidence-coach.thinkific.com/
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